February 2021:  Love Is the Answer

“Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.”  Martin Luther King Jr.

This is one of my favorite MLK quotes. It feels true and hopeful. There is so much that we can’t control, but we can always focus on love. We need to cultivate love (and kindness and compassion) for ourselves and for others. This is something I often help people with and it can be very healing, empowering and transformative. But like most things, it is not quick or easy. It is a practice to cultivate.

This month I invite you to consider ways to bring love and kindness to yourself and to others. And as always, allow yourself to be a work in progress.

If you need some help or support, please reach out and contact me at linda@stilescousneling.com

Love  

noun

1. a strong feeling of deep affection, fondness, warmth, intimacy
2. a great interest and pleasure in something.
3. unselfish, loyal and benevolent concern for the good of another.

verb

1. to feel deep affection for (someone)
2. to like or enjoy very much
3. to hold dear, cherish, care for

Loving Yourself

Tips for Learning How to Love Yourself

https://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-15295/how-do-you-actually-learn-to-love-yourself.html

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/sense-and-sensitivity/201401/3-ways-learn-love-yourself

Brene Brown on Shame & Vulnerability

According to Brene Brown, “Shame is an “intensely painful feeling or experience of believing that we are flawed and therefore unworthy of love and belonging.” This is a common struggle- but the truth is that you are deserving of love. Listen to the TED Talk to learn more:

https://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_listening_to_shame/transcript?language=en

Loving Others

In a Romantic Relationship

According to John & Julie Gottman, and Chrisanna Northrup, author of The Normal Bar, “People who have a great sex life say “I love you” to their partner every day and mean it. They kiss one another passionately for no reason at all, give compliments, give surprise romantic gifts, know what turns their partner on and do it often, are affectionate in public, play together, have fun—and they cuddle, cuddle, cuddle.”
From The New Science of Couples Therapy, John Gottman, Julie Gottman May/June 2018 Psychotherapy Networker

What are Your Love Languages?

What makes you, and your loved ones, feel loved and cared for? Do you most need words of affirmation, acts of service, quality time or gifts? How about your partner? Take this quiz to identify your love languages and learn more about how knowing this can help boost your relationship satisfaction.
https://www.5lovelanguages.com/quizzes/

Show Love with Random Acts of Kindness

From Uplift Connect
https://upliftconnect.com/which-random-acts-of-kindness-will-make-you-happiest/

50 Fun Kindness Ideas to Celebrate Random Acts of Kindness Day
https://www.randomactsofkindness.org/the-kindness-blog/2943-50-kindness-ideas-for-random-acts-of-kindness-day

With our Children

Love Your Child – 10 Ways to Love the One You’re With
https://www.ahaparenting.com/Default.aspx?SiteSearchID=1960&PageID=1696425&OT=6,7,43,26,48

Quotes & Inspiration

“The art of love…is largely the art of persistence.” – Albert Ellis, Psychologist

“To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance.” – Oscar Wilde

“Love is the only force capable of transforming an enemy into a friend.”  ― Martin Luther King, Jr.

“Love is the great miracle cure. Loving ourselves works miracles in our lives.” —Louise L. Hay

“To be beautiful means to be yourself. You don’t need to be accepted by others. You need to accept yourself.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh

Fun Things to Embrace in February:

Feb 7^th –    Superbowl Sunday – Go Chiefs!!! ❤️🏈🧡

Feb 9^th –   National Pizza Day 🍕

Feb 14^th – Valentine’s Day 💕

Feb 17^th – Random Acts of Kindness Day 😊