Cultivating Healthy Relationships
Relationships, like our yards and gardens, require regular upkeep!
I have been doing a lot of yardwork lately. I enjoy doing this, but it is a lot of work! Just cleaning out the leaves, weeds etc. has taken more time that I anticipated. One day, it seemed like I worked all day and barely made a dent. I began thinking about how this work is a never-ending process. Every year requires cleaning out the old, planning, planting, cultivating, maintaining, investing time and energy. It occurred to me that this is a good analogy for our relationships.
A close, committed relationship requires this ongoing work, care, feeding, nurturing, etc. It is an ongoing process, and if we neglect it too much the weeds seem to take over. I sometimes use a rosebush as an example. In the beginning of our relationship, we put lots of time and energy into the care and feeding of the relationship (rosebush) and we get beautiful flowers. But eventually we likely realize that it is not so beautiful because it has been neglected. This is normal and it can sneak up on us. But, we can always regroup and give our relationships some TLC. Make sure you are putting good things into that relationship space –think Miracle grow not toxic chemicals.
I believe that this work- both in the garden and especially in our relationship- is well worth the effort. There is a satisfaction in doing the work and enjoying the fruits of our labor. Even when things don’t go perfectly. We can’t control everything, but we can do a lot and can strive to find joy along the way.
If you need help with this, reach out for some support and contact me at linda@stilescousneling.com
May is Mental Health Awareness Month
At least 1 in 5 people will have a mental health condition in their lifetime. And stress, change, loss and adversity impact all of us. We need support, compassion and tools for coping. If you need some help, please reach out to schedule an appointment.
Tools2Thrive
- Owning your feelings • Finding the positive • Connecting with others • Eliminating toxic influences • Creating healthy routines
Learn more about tools to support mental health at mhanational.org/may.
#YouAreNotAlone #StampOutStigma #Tools2Thrive
NAMI – You Are Not Alone
Alcohol Awareness & Covid-19
April was Alcohol Awareness Month. It is a good time to check in with ourselves and make sure that we are aware of healthy parameters. Problem drinking impacts our health as well as our relationships. Increased alcohol use during the Covid-19 pandemic is a topic that has been in the news. It is definitely a time of increased stress and uncertainty and some of our normal activities and coping outlets have been impacted by the stay at home order. Following are some articles and resources that might be helpful.
Get the Facts on Alcohol Use
What is Moderate Drinking?
From https://www.cdc.gov/alcohol/fact-sheets/moderate-drinking.htm
What to Do About Drinking Alcohol With COVID-19 Coronavirus and Social Distancing
Quotes & Inspiration
Cultivating loving kindness for ourselves is the foundation of real love…for all beings and for life itself – Sharon Salzberg
Your mind is the garden, your thoughts are the seeds, you can plant flowers, or you can plant weeds. – unknown
The grass is greener where you water it. – unknown
Affirmation: I am cultivating a beautiful, healthy relationship with myself and others.
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